Ham Farts and Lizards

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I bet you didn’t know Ham could fart did you? He can–nearly chased me out of the room. Obviously I’m not talking about something you glaze and bake that was once a cute pink critter w/a curly tail :dork:

So anyway Monday Night I hear this scratching noise behind my printer stand. I have no clue what it is but there’s windows right there and they’re low to the ground. I can see squirles going by so I figure it’s squirrels in the leaves.

Tuesday night again I hear rustle rustle rustle . Then we discover Ham got left outside! SSoooooooooooo I assumed that’s what made the noise.

Wednesday afternoon #1 and I are sitting here at the computer playing yahoo games.
rustle rustle rustle
MOI: What IS that noise?
#1:Dunno (he’s nothing if not succinct).

So we start looking around. and #1 says it’s the lizard that Ham dragged in (and ate the tail off of) on Monday.

Sure enough, peeking out from under the printer stand is said lizard. EWWWWWW

MOI: #1 Get the lizard!

#1: Ewwwwwwww NOOOOOO

MOI: #2!!!!!!! COME GET THIS LIZARD!!!!!!

#2 comes trotting in with my mother’s 10 in. crystal cake holder!!!!

MOI: NO NO NOOOOO GO PUT THAT BACK

#1 comes back with a dish soapy water

MOI: Planning on washing it to death?

#1 leaves and I find an empty Starbucks cup. Hoping the lingering fragrance of Black Tazo Tea with Valencia will LURE the Lizard in, I turn around and face my nemesis. He runs back under the printer stand. I’m patient. I’ll wait.

In the mean time #2 comes back with my grandmother’s crystal candy dish.

Moi: NO NO NO NOOOOOO GO PUT THAT BACK!!!!!!!

Lizard comes back out and runs behind plastic tub. I set the cup (a venti) down and wait. STupid lizard aparently likes Black Tazo Tea with Valencia because he runs in the cup and I slam the lid on.

#2 says “lets kill him!”

Don’t worry I let him go. 😀

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